We DeSimone's: Heart Surgery

The last month has been pretty stressful to say the least. We found out Hudson has what is called a bicuspid valve when he was about 2 months old, but it seemed like, from what the cardiologist had said, that it could or could not be a big deal. I assumed that meant it wasn't going to be a big deal. Then at his next appointment at about 3 1/2 months, it turned out to be a big deal. She told me he had a narrowing in his aorta called a coarctation and that he was going to have to have surgery because it was causing his blood pressure to get too high. What it is is a part of his aorta leading out to the body was constricting and so the blood pressure in his arms was normal but because it was going to the rest of his body then his blood pressure in the legs was high, and the rest of his body didn't like it either. They said that his kidneys weren't getting enough blood so they sent a hormone up to the lungs and in turn the lungs sent a signal to the heart telling it to PUMP HARDER! So it did! He didn't have any of the usual warning signs of a baby with heart issues. He eats ALL the time. No joke, a kid at his age usually eats 3-4 hours apart and Hudson eats 2 (MAX 3) hours apart. So any who, I was a wreck. She said surgery and immediately my eyes filled with tears. I tried very hard to not start bawling and listen to what she had to say because I was going to have to make big decisions and relay everything she said back to Tyler, but alas, I couldn't do it. She maybe got 10 more words out and out came my tears. I still tried to listen, but as hard as I tried I couldn't stop crying! My baby. My 3 month old had to have surgery. Oh and it's not just surgery, but HEART surgery!! I watch Grey's anatomy! I know Heart surgery is a big deal! And what's a bigger deal? BABY HEART SURGERY! I told Tyler as soon as we left the appointment and he was sad too. For me it was the fear of losing Hudson, for Tyler it was the fact that Hudson was going to be in pain and had to go through this whole ordeal. We had to wait about a week to even hear when the surgery would happen, and then we had surgery 2 weeks later. The Tuesday before he had his pre-op check up and he had had a cold so I wasn't sure we would go through with it. If he was going to have surgery I wanted the odds to be in his favor (yes, I did just quote hunger games). I had been praying really hard over the previous three weeks pleading with Heavenly Father that everything would go perfectly. There were times when my faith was almost nonexistent and I would say, YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TAKE HIM AWAY! Dramatic, I know, but there was the chance of something going wrong and I didn't want us to be that chance. I had prayed the night before his preop to know whether or not we should do the surgery and I didn't feel like I got an answer! I was wishy washy, but Tyler was adament. He needed to have the surgery. On the drive home I said to Tyler, "you really feel like we should do it? You don't think we should wait till his cold has cleared up?" and Tyler responded, "no, we should do it now. We don't want it to get any worse." I had told him I couldn't figure out what my answer to my prayers was, but maybe because he seemed so sure that was my answer. The whole night before the surgery Hudson was up and coughing. Still, I was unsure. I mean we could still cancel. It wasn't too late! And at 6 AM when we got up to head to Primary Children's I asked Tyler if we should cancel, still he said we should do it. We got to the hospital and it was all pretty routine. They checked him out and then we moved to the waiting room where there were multiple families waiting to have their children taken back into surgery. I was holding back my stress, and just trying to snuggle my baby as much as possible. Other parents acted like it was no big deal. Then it was our turn, we met the surgeon and he told us all the possible negative side effects. 1% chance of death was what stuck out in my mind. 1 %. Small, but possible. He said that everything looked like it should be easy. It doesn't seem like it would be a big deal, and the other side effects wouldn't be that big of a deal either. He left and I just looked at Hudson thinking how much it sucked (for the lack of a better word) that this 3 month old had to go through all of this. Then the anesthesiologist led us back to the doors where he would take Hudson through to the surgery. He talked to us for a minute, and told us all the side effects of anesthesia. Then he took Hudson. I gave him a kiss, and then had to turn around and give him another one. At this point tears were streaming down my face. I hated it. I was sobbing at this point and still had to walk back through the room where all the other parents were to grab our stuff. As we walked through there was a girl whose son was also having surgery and she asked me if she could pray with me. We stood there together, her hand on my arms and she said a prayer for my sweet baby. I was overwhelmed with the kindness and love that this girl showed me. How wonderful it was that she was willing to step out of herself, when her son was going to have surgery as well, and see that I was in need. Her faith was inspiring and when she was done I gave her a hug. It was a great way to start off our 3 hour wait. We waited, and snacked, and talked and waited some more. We got one update saying that they were starting the surgery, and 2 hours after that the surgeon came in. Instead of just telling us in the waiting room, like all the other surgeons were doing he said, "let's go into this room," gesturing to one of the consultation rooms. My heart dropped. My worst fears were coming to fruition! You're kidding me! We got into the room and he said, " everything went great!" hahah Oh my HEAVEN'S! he apologized for making us worry by asking us to go in that room, but he didn't wan to share our business with everybody else;totally understandable. So he was good! We were able to see him about 45 minutes later in the CICU. the next 5 days were interesting. the nurses all kept saying they couldn't believe he had just had heart surgery because he was doing great! it only took 2 days and he was smiling again. He was sent home 5 days later on blood pressure medication. The nurse said it wasn't uncommon for babies to go home on a feeding tube after a coarctation repair so I was glad Hudson was doing well, even if he was fussy. The week after was an incredibly stressful week. Hudson was NOT himself. He screamed and wouldn't sleep. Even when he was getting pain medication, it didn't seem to help. I just felt so bad for my poor baby, but neither Tyler nor I could figure out what he needed. This last week and a half has been 85% better. Hudson still gets into these times where he screams and cries and I can't do anything for him, but the doctors say the coarcation is gone and he can get off his medication for now. He has a 10% chance of the aorta narrowing again, and there is one other thing that possibly could be a problem at some point in his life where surgery will be necessary, but for now, my baby is healthy. 3 weeks later and you'd never guess this kid had heart surgery. His incision is mostly healed and the glue is slowly coming off.
I have to say, Thank You, for all the thoughts, and prayers, and good vibes sent our way from all of you. I am sure Heavenly Father heard us. This whole process has confirmed this to me. That even through trial He knows us and loves us. He does what he can to answer our prayers and sends incredible people into our lives to help us deal with those prayers he can't answer the way we want.
And now for the pictures!

Right after surgery. He was out. I'm glad though because I didn't want him feeling ANY pain.

Tyler was really nervous to hold him. I finally convinced him too. I was nervous too, but my desire to hold him made me more confident. Even with all the tubes and IV's.